So much for bunnies

Easter has always been a problem for me. It doesn't lie in the emotional roller coaster of the passion and death, let alone the reality bending ressurection. That I go with. It's not only my job but it's where my gravity takes me. I guess this is the 'ground of being' that Tillich talked about. These rocks are the home soil of my home. I know them. Painful and paradoxically joyful all together they take me back to center.

Nope, that's not the problem. It's the cute factor. The kiddie fun and frolic thing. The family get together and sit down to a Thanksgiving dinner with a different menu moment. Now don't get me wrong, I think Easter egg hunts are great. And I really like fresh pork and lamb. The two poles, ressurection and family fun don't create a tension, they create a dissenence. They jangle my soul. It's like we're trying to go in two directions at the same time. Disconcerting at the least.

Analogy time. An earthquake just happened. Everything is shaken and some of the stuff we depended upon is broken. And we are joyous that we are alive and grieving at the suffering around us. Mint jelly and giggles just don't fit.

Now, admittedly, exhaustion may have something to do with the whole thing. But I'm exhausted at Christmas and I don't suffer the disconnect. So, call me a curmuddgeon, however you spell that. I've tried for years to participate and fit in and even organize these events. But I've always felt like I needed to leave after I hid the eggs and set the table. I guess that's not all bad and maybe I need to stop feeling guilty about not being more enthusiastic about this stuff. This is Easter. Easter. Whew.

So, a blessed Easter to you all. Have a nice dinner. I'll be out in the grave yard. He is risen.