How to Write a Eulogy II

There’s one basic difference between a funeral and a Christian funeral. The best you can hope for in a funeral without a Christian witness is a memorial and a lifting of the heritage left to us by the one who has died. In my humble opinion, if a funeral can climb up to the point of lifting up of heritage, it’s better than a canned set of prayers and scriptures. The name Jesus may be stated but there’s not much Holy Spirit blowing through there.

But a Christian funeral that focuses on the presence of a living Lord, imminent, and powerful plants a blooming flower in the midst of the dim twilight of this moment of loss and grief. I take that as my job. But anyone who is a person of faith can witness to the power of the resurrection. You don’t do this by horning in, or by denying the weight of grief. The presence of faith, and the healing love that comes with it can make a world of difference with the simple words, “I’m sorry for your loss. You’re in our prayers.”

I taught my boys to say that when they went to a funeral, to shake hands with the grieving family, to speak simply and directly, then to stand and listen. Presence means everything.

But what I try to offer in a funeral service is to remind people of the truth that even in this darkness there is the presence of something more than a life that has ended. That’s Christian hope. I don’t like funerals that don’t have hymns in them. We need to sing. It’s good to have the symbols of the holy around us. We need to be surrounded by the colors and reminders of the moments of inspiration that have lifted our lives beyond the ordinary and usual. As we see the one who’s died and ourselves in the context of Christmas and baptism and communion and Easter we share this moment with the journey of our Lord. That’s a funeral that offers us an opportunity for hope.

So now, you’ve heard what I think of funerals. Next time we’ll talk about Eulogies.